Thank your child for telling you and affirm that they did the right thing by listening to their feelings and telling a trusted adult.
You can ask them open-ended questions like: “Can you tell me more?” or, if appropriate, “What would help you feel more comfortable?”
Decide how you are going to proceed. In some cases, if your child discloses the person engaging in specific unsafe behaviors (such as trying to spend one-on-one time with them or making comments about their body), reporting the individual may be necessary.
You may also take steps to ensure your child does not have to interact with this individual again, even if they did not engage in a specific unsafe behavior. A feeling of discomfort is enough.
If it was a healthcare professional, reinforce the clean and healthy rule: “even though I and the other grown-ups responsible for you may still say you need to get certain care to make sure you are healthy, you are always allowed to tell me if something makes you uncomfortable. We can always talk about what the procedure is and why you need to get it, and ways to help you feel more comfortable.”
Examples of adjustments to make children more comfortable with medical procedures:
– Request a clinician of the same gender to perform the exam
– Nurse or someone else chaperone the exam instead of the parent/guardian
– Meet the clinician at the initial visit without performing any exams of the private parts of the body. Come back for another visit for a physical exam
– Use dolls or stuffed animals to demonstrate procedures beforehand
– Leave clothing on and move it to the side as needed to perform a physical exam
– Allow the child to ask as many questions as they need