When is the right age to start talking about online safety and consent?
Earlier than most parents expect, and more gradually than most parents plan. Many children are first exposed to sexualized content, messaging, or peer pressure around age 11, sometimes younger, often without seeking it out. That means waiting until adolescence can leave kids trying to interpret adult material without adult guidance. Think of this as an […]
What emotional reactions are normal after online or sexual harm?
How do I balance monitoring my child’s online activity with building trust?
Monitoring without conversation feels like surveillance. Conversation without monitoring can feel naïve. The balance comes from transparency. Let your child know what you check, why you check it, and that it’s about safety, not control. When kids understand that monitoring is predictable and protective, not random or punitive, they are less likely to hide and […]
Should I put my child in therapy right away?
Therapy can help, but it should be trauma-informed and voluntary when possible. For some children, stabilizing routines and trusted adult support come first.
What if my child shuts down or says they don’t want to talk?
Shutting down is often a sign that a child feels overwhelmed, not that they don’t care. Forcing the conversation can make it harder next time. What helps is leaving the door open without pressure. You might say, “I can tell this feels like a lot. We don’t have to talk right now, but I want […]
How do I avoid re-traumatizing my child when talking about it?
Let your child guide the depth and timing of conversations. Avoid repeated questioning or asking for details unless necessary. You can remind them that they are in charge of what they share and that they can stop the conversation at any time. Your calm presence matters more than gathering information.
What if the harm involved another student? Should I contact the other child’s parents?
Peer-to-peer harm is still harm. Schools should address it with safety planning, accountability, and support rather than minimizing it as normal behavior. Your role is to advocate for your child’s safety and well-being, not to determine intent or punishment. In many situations, it is safer to go through the school or a professional rather than […]
How do I advocate for my child at school without escalating things?
Document concerns, ask about safety plans, and request clear communication. You can ask schools what steps they are taking to protect your child without demanding punishment.
How should I handle jokes, teasing, or peer pressure?
Children often tolerate discomfort to avoid social fallout. They may think they are being too sensitive if others are laughing. You can say, “If something makes you uncomfortable, that’s enough. You don’t have to like something just because other people think it’s funny.” Help them practice simple phrases like, “That’s not funny to me,” or […]
My child says it was “just a joke.” Should I drop it?
Children often use humor to reduce discomfort, embarrassment, or fear. Calling something a joke does not mean it felt okay. It often means they want the situation to stop without drawing attention to themselves. You do not need to challenge their words. You can gently widen the conversation. You might say, “Sometimes things start as […]